09 Nov Cool As A Cucumber: Staying Calm While You’re Smack Dab In The Middle Of Chaos
I’ve had a difficult time staying focused and centered lately. It’s been a very busy month.
First, I traveled every week during the month of October. This included a cross-country trip to California. This also meant less time than usual to manage my business.
Second, my uncle passed away unexpectedly just before Halloween. This created some upheaval, particularly around the care of my 92 year-old grandmother, who shared her home with him.
Third, the election happened. In the days leading up to it, I felt uneasy. I’m now one of the millions of people who are deeply concerned about the results and the health of our country.
So a lot has been going on. Some of it by choice, and some of it I had no control over. In either case, I had to figure out which tasks for my business were a priority and which were not, and how to take care of myself in the meantime.
But energy management and boundaries were a challenge for me. In California, I was surrounded by other coaches and healers who shared their ideas of how I should communicate with potential clients. With my family, I received numerous calls and texts requesting my input about decisions that needed to be made.
All of which led to high levels of confusion and craziness. In California I started doubting my message. After my uncle’s passing it became more difficult to focus on my business and self-care. And then there was the election, after which I felt more shock and sadness.
After sharing my feelings and experience with several people, I finally realized what was happening.
1. Once again I let others decide for me what was true, what was important, and what makes sense. There’s nothing wrong with getting feedback, but it’s up to me to decide what’s true for ME, and be grounded in that truth. I needed to listen to my inner wisdom and let go of other people’s opinions… even well-meaning coaches.
2. I let my family knock me off balance. Because they’re family. And you should be there for family, right? But here’s the thing: everyone in my family, except my grandmother at this stage in her life, is perfectly capable of managing their emotions and making decisions. If I don’t answer every call or text or spend every moment with them it’s not the end of the world. As it happens, they’re figuring things out without me.
3. I can choose to take the high road instead. I’ll admit it, I’ve been grumpy at times, but I don’t have to let the stress get to me. I can be a leader, be compassionate, and move with ease and grace. That’s how I like to approach things anyway. Spiraling into a pit of despair and negativity helps no one. Focusing on the opportunity to add value helps everyone. Things still may not go smoothly but things will be calm despite the chaos.
Managing your energy and emotions during a crazy time is challenging. It’s easy to attack others – and ourselves – when life throws you curveballs. It’s also easy to feel like a victim and just curl up on the couch and do nothing. You might need to for a few moments, but eventually you’ll get up and face the challenges head on. And you can do that from a place of calm, centeredness, and renewed energy.
If you’re going through a challenging time or trying to make sense of an outcome, you don’t have to have all the answers right now, but you can have faith that you’re moving towards a resolution.
And even as events happen beyond your control, you can stay rooted in a sense of groundedness and peace. You can feel calm inside despite what’s happening outside.
How do you stay centered during a challenging time? Please share your thoughts below!